I am tired of being overweight. Yes, I am overweight. My weight has affected me not just physically but also emotionally. I am not as confident as before and sometimes I hate myself for letting myself get this big.
Initially, I had an excuse to eat so much. I was pregnant and the mood swings were killing me. I found a way to easen it up a bit by eating foods that weren’t exactly good for me. During my pregnancy, I can devour half a dozen of Krispy Kreme Donuts in one sitting. Slowly, unhealthy fat started building up in my belly.
I’ve tried dieting so many times. I signed up in a gym but I barely went. In a span of 6 months, I went there more or less 10 times. I always whine on how fat and unattractive I’ve become. And now, i know it’s time to stop whining and actually do something about it. It’s a tough decision. Last night, I was doing grocery shopping and I chanced upon the box of Nestle 14-day challenge cereals.
Grabbing it was so easy -like I just decided in a snap to start getting in shape. After couple of minutes of walking around, thoughts started flashing in my head.
“How can I do this? I have a gallon of ice cream at home! I don’t want to waste food!”
” The maid bought a lot of stuff already for the week. I’ll miss out on the sumptuous ulams! ”
“I like watching movies and going out. What am I supposed to eat then?”
Seriously, I was looking for excuses to start this “diet” next week. I even told myself that carrying the liter of milk is hard. I might as well put it back. But alas, my will was stronger and I insisted that the best time to start is NOW.
As of writing, I am really hungry! It’s only the first day and I haven’t even gone as far as lunch, yet, I’m worrying so much already. I should keep in mind what I read in “Thinking Yourself Thin”. I shouldn’t set myself up for failure. If early on, I’d tell myself that I’ll give in to binge eating again during parties or when a buffet table is sprawled out in front of me, then I’ll definitely FAIL!
I just need to be positive, learn to pick myself up when I fall and start where I left off.